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Hi
I’m Debbie Rivers
I know that it’s never too late to have the life you have imagined.
One question I’m often asked is "How on earth did you get started in all this?"
Great question! The first thing that comes to mind is insanity but that’s not it. For me, it is about making a real difference in the lives of singles out there. I am honest, straight- forward and part love fairy! Real love may not magically happen, yet it can be magic!
Most of all I am on a mission to get you to realise that you are not broken, messed up or even unlovable … and that you’re a pretty awesome person worthy of happiness, love and a beautiful relationship where you wake up feeling loved every. single. day.
I’m an internationally accredited Relationship Expert and certified coach. But more importantly?
I’ve been doing this for over a decade. I’m consumed with empowering singles just like you to be successful in love. I am obsessed with having bigger conversations about love, dating and relationships. The ones that change lives.
I have been where you are and not just in a vague, “Oh I get it,” way. But, I’ve seriously been where you are.
Coming out of a marriage that I thought would last forever and wondering if I even believe in love anymore! I had always dreamt of my own happily ever after and it didn’t work out. I felt like a big fat failure because I failed at the one thing I truly wanted. How the hell did this happen and how could I let love in again?
… Let alone work out how to date after 21 years!?”
I Get YOU Because I Was YOU
Not only am I a sought after coach for both men and women (an accredited relationship coach and professional certified coach). I am regularly featured in the media as well as the founder of Perth’s Premier Dating Service Dare2Date.
But more importantly, I am also well-versed in the art of actually being single After a long marriage, I experienced the modern dating scene and it was a completely different world. Gosh, it even came with its own language that mostly described bad behaviour! I was surprised by what I found.
When I was dating I managed to have fun (yes, it is possible), get 2nd dates most of the time! Yet I seemed to have a super skill to date the same type of man who didn’t work for me, or I could find any commitment-phobic man in a 500 km radius. Yet when I did find a great guy I would find a way to sabotage it, in the hope that he would love me regardless. You know I think deep down I wanted to prove I was worthwhile! Guess what, spoiler alert, they didn’t love me regardless.
After a massive amount of self-work, study, real-life experiences and research, I stopped doing all the self-sabotage and pushing good men away. I also cut through the crappy dating advice that is out there that doesn’t work! You know all the weird stuff that we’re told we should do. Instead, I put everything I had learned into practice, as well as learning how to love and accept me first. I know first-hand that it isn’t too late to live the life that you want even after 50 when I am no longer my youngest, or thinnest (why do we put so much value on that -cos I’ve found it doesn’t matter )!!
It’s never too late to have that love you imagined.
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So You’re Single
You’re probably frustrated and over it or maybe don’t know where to start! Yes, you’ve probably had some really, really crappy relationships. Or no relationships because things haven’t worked out for you.
But it’s not your fault. It really isn’t. The truth is … you haven’t been taught how to create a good relationship. They teach everything else in school, but not this. In fact, you have been taught through Rom Coms and fairytales that love will magically happen. Or you have learnt all about relationships from your parent’s unhealthy relationship. Instead of a fairytale, you ended up in a nightmare! The good news is you can create a relationship rather than FIND relationship one! You don’t need to go on some epic quest to find it, it is not hiding in some mysterious location!
Great relationships aren’t delivered to you by the love fairies! They are created by two very imperfect humans who have insecurities, baggage, past experiences and yes wait for it – flaws! It’s no surprise that you feel scared, hesitant and sick and tired of it all! #realtalk
Maybe you…
Think it is just a matter of meeting that one right person. Yet, you can be on endless dating apps, go out all the time, could even hire a matchmaker but it won’t work if you don’t start with YOU. Because if you have no idea how to create a healthy relationship with another person, then you’re gonna end up in the same place. Research even backs this up and not only did I do this but I have seen others do it time and time again
If you keep doing the same thing – nothing will change.
You may be happy on your own, yet still feel that life could be better with someone.
Do you find yourself:
1. Hating the thought of all those occasions that you have to go to on your own? Because they feel like a powerful reminder you just how alone you are!. You know weddings, special events, and don’t get me started on holidays! You want to travel but don’t have anyone to go with.
2. God, reading another self-help book about how to win a man! Like he is the prize – this just doesn’t seem very empowering!
3. Craving physical affection with someone you actually like
4. Your girlfriends or mates are great but it’s not quite the same!
HOw…
I can hear you asking me, ‘How do I do this, Debbie? Don’t I just have to meet the right person and everything will just work out?’
NOPE
It doesn’t! I know that you would like me to magically find your person. Or give you the superficial advice so you can pretend you are the confident person who has it all together to win that person over or get your ex back, while underneath you are still doing the same stuff that doesn’t work.
Because I know it goes so much deeper than the superficial stuff to make real change stick. This isn’t just about love and dating. This is about believing in yourself and learning how to have the self-awareness and tools to be more confident, deal with rejection, and be a lot more resilient when you are dating.
You will stop wasting time on people who can’t give you what you want and need. Instead of wasting years of your valuable time, you will be able to spot it straight away. So, you can walk away instead of being stuck in all that drama and emotional chaos. You’ll be able to teach people how to treat you because you actually REALLY know your worth.
Unfortunately, everything doesn’t fall magically into place when you meet someone new. Because you will still come will your own unique baggage and so will they!
The good news is that it all gets so much easier when you accept yourself, understand how to have a healthy relationship and be able to be vulnerable.
Of course, it seems so much easier to go online and put the problem outside of yourself, but you already know that doesn’t get the results YOU want.
Like I said no-one teaches us this stuff in school. So, you aren’t alone in not knowing how. But if you want an awesome relationship it’s time to learn how. This includes how to have healthy boundaries and the tough conversations that are always a reality in any relationship. This will save you from being yet another divorce statistic!
I’m here to help you do just that
Together, we’re going to pinpoint the beliefs that are sabotaging your happiness and relationships —and keep you accountable to get results.
Here’s the boring qualification stuff, cos I know that matters too! I am continually learning the latest advances in how the brain works, especially when it comes to love, so I can give you cutting edge tools. My unique approach applies behavioural science, neuroscience, and attraction strategies that will give you the everything you need. I am a Certified Practitioner in Coaching, Completed Level 1 and 2 Training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy, a Master Neuro-Linguistic Programming Coach, a Certified Master mBIT Coach (Europe) and a Certified Matchmaker with the Matchmakers Institute in New York.
Fun Facts About Me:
- My love of travel started at 7! Since my divorce I have travelled to 35 countries and loved every moment.
- Love to learn and find solutions.
- Enjoyed jumping out of a plane - made me feel alive.
- Love Brussel sprouts, cheese and cucumber sandwiches (there is a cool story why) and food in general.
- Used to work in an occupation no one liked, but in a strange way it perfectly prepared me for what I do now. Can you guess what it was?
- I love live music -this started young with my parents loving to go out. I even remember my first concert, I was lucky enough for it to be Abba!
- Have a sweet tooth - give me a packet of lollies or a block of chocolate and I would eat it all! In fact if you asked me, 'If I had to give up coffee or chocolate?' The answer would always be coffee.
- I genuinely enjoy meeting new people and can quickly take small talk in to an awesome conversation. I love a mix of an intelligent conversations and light hearted banter.
MEDIA APPEARANCES
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